On endings forced upon us.

I believe in the natural, inherent rhythm of things in our lives; highs, lows, beginnings and endings.

Each person on this planet has their own rhythm which dictates these patterns of change within their lives, but only if they let it. What I mean by this is that many of us can choose to adapt and follow the rules and rhythms which have been prescribed by society. 

A common prescription is: get an education, get a job, get married , have children and retire. This prescription does allow a familiar route for us to take, it is comfortable, validates us in the eyes of many and we can definitely be happy here.

I believe the lucky ones are the ones who have a pre-set route, are encouraged towards it by their family and peers and find the journey down the said route, truly fulfilling. The majority of us, have it the other way round – we know our purpose, it isn’t deemed favorable by our loved ones, we ignore it and take another suggested route. 

People are so varied, in their temperament,  tolerance levels and how often they check in with their heart’s calling. So it is not surprising that there is a subset of humans who can put their true purpose on the back burner and still lead happy lives. So now we’re left with a group of people who know what their purpose is, are not living it out and wake up everyday with a sense of being displaced from reality – because they are. The inner calling doesn’t reflectthe outer manifestation. 

I’m going to relate a common experience people in this last subset go through constantly: ignoring the need to end an endeavor which is hurting them because it is not serving them. This need is ignored because of a number of fears; fear of judgement, fear of admitting personal limitations, fear of asking for help, fear of starting over…it’s endless but it is all rooted in fear.

The entire point of this post is it to tell you: give it up already and admit that a change is in order. Personally, I never admit to the need until it’s too late and the end is forced on me – not fun. The present course of action doesn’t serve you if you are truly miserable, unable to maintain your health or sanity, don’t find the outcomes satisfying on a heart level and most importantly, if you are tolerating instead of embracing the experience. By a similar token, if the circumstances are tolerating rather than celebrating your involvement, it’s a good sign you’re not there for the right reasons.
So please do us (mostly yourself) a favor and make the necessary change. Before it is forced on you. Let’s take a common example: trying to quit smoking. It’s a difficult undertaking and it’s comfortable for most of us to not do anything about it. So the smoker and the ciggy maintain their toxic (but familiar and therefore, comfortable ) friendship, until a pulmonary test forces the smoker to accept the friendship has to end and he/she makes an admirable effort to quit. It doesn’t have to be a cigarette. It could be a job. A relationship.

I hope you figure it out in time. Goodluck.

P.S: Smoking is difficult to quit, I do understand, but it was a good example that many people could  relate to. Despite the many efforts to educate people on the evils of the ciggy, it doesn’t stop people from continuing the habit or even picking it up. This post is not meant to offend smokers. Thank you. Good day!

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